英国爱丁堡留学社区
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【中英文】个人陈述书写建议
86scot(2018/8/13 15:56:52) 点击:117627 回复:0 IP:220.* * *
86scot(2018/8/13 15:56:52) 点击:117627 回复:0 IP:220.* * *
教育部最新数据显示，中国2017年出国留学总人数突破60万大关，相比上一年增长了11.74%。想要出国留学，除了考出好成绩，还要写一封打动招生老师的“个人陈述”。一起来看看英国大学的招生老师为大家揭秘，如何写个人陈述最加分？
First, you will have to register with Ucas and enter your personal details. You will then be able to apply for up to five courses. Make sure you cross reference the course requirements with your predicted grades and A-level choices so you won’t get rejected before you have even taken your exams.
首先，你需要在英国大学和学院招生服务中心网站注册，并录入个人信息。之后你可以申请最多五种课程。要确保将课程要求和你预计的成绩以及A-level（英国高中课程）选择加以对照，以免还没考试就被学校拒了。
You will then be asked to detail your education and qualifications to date and to give details of any jobs you have had. It’s also a good idea to nail down who will be providing your academic reference as soon as possible – make sure you give your teacher enough time to make it a good one.
之后，你将被要求详述迄今为止的教育背景和所获证书，以及你做过什么工作。最好能尽快找到人选为你写学术推荐信，要确保你为写推荐信的老师留出了足够的时间，这样才能写好。
Finally, before you submit your application, you will be asked to include your personal statement. This is your chance to convince your university or college that you are the right person to study their course.
最后，在提交申请前，你还要按要求提交个人陈述。这是你说服申请院校录取你的一个机会。
For some people, writing a personal statement will come easily. But for those who are feeling daunted about the prospect of putting 4,000 characters together, you are not alone. A
自然拼读法4-15岁孩子记单词方法
s Stuart Balnaves, head of learner experience at Ucas, puts it: “Those three words – Ucas personal statement – can stike fear into students’ hearts", but there are ways to make the process easier.
对大多数人来说，写个人陈述并不困难。但也有不少人一想到要写4000字的文章就头皮发麻。英国大学和学院招生服务中心学生体验负责人斯图亚特-巴尔内夫斯说：“入学个人陈述这三个词语会让学生心生恐慌”，但有些办法能让这件事儿更简单。
To start with, jot down reasons why you want to study your chosen course. Is it a new passion or an old interest? Were you inspired by something you read or does it lead towards the career you would eventually like to pursue – in which case, what is it that appeals to you about that career?
首先，大概写下为什么你选择了这一课程。是最近才感兴趣，还是由来已久？是受到了某篇文章的启发，还是决心今后干这一行？这个职业又有哪些吸引你的地方？
Secondly, think about what you can say you have done to demonstrate why you are passionate about this particular subject. Have you taken part in a society or club outside of school? Do you enjoy reading about your subject, if yes, what books particularly interest you and why?
其次，想想看如何描述个人经历，以便说明为什么对这一课程充满热情。你在课外参加过社会实践或者加入过社团吗？喜欢读有关的书吗？如果是，你对哪些书最感兴趣？为什么？
Have you worked in any roles that help with skills that universities might find appealing? Have you helped fellow students at school, have you volunteered or undertaken work experience in your field?
你做过哪些工作，有助于提升大学所需技能吗？你在学校帮助过同学吗？参加过志愿活动，或者在你自己感兴趣的领域有过工作经验吗？
“The best statements will show that a student is interested in the subject; that they've studied it, that they've developed an interest it in outside school, and that they're developing their skills and abilities outside academia,” says Liz Hunt, undergraduate admissions manager at the University of Sheffield.
英国谢菲尔德大学本科入学主管利兹-亨特说：“最好的个人陈述能表明申请者对课程感兴趣，曾有过这方面的学习经历，在课外也有相关爱好，除学业外，也一直在提升个人能力。”
However, she advises students to avoid rambling: “Some try to tell you their life story,” she continues, “sometimes this can be quite useful, but it needs to be relevant rambling, it needs to tell admissions tutors why you have decided on a particular subject.”
但她建议学生不要啰嗦：“一些学生试图讲述生活中的故事，有时这很有用，但这得和申请有关，得是在告诉招生老师为什么你决定学习这一课程。”
James Williams, lecturer in education at the University of Sussex, agrees: “Admissions tutors are looking to see that you have an understanding about the course you are applying for,” he says. “Content of courses will be different at different universities, so we don’t look for applicants to be too specific, but candidates should look for common topics and address these.”
英国苏塞克斯大学教育学讲师詹姆斯-威廉姆斯也同意这一点，他说：“招生老师会注意看你是否理解你申请的课程。不同大学的课程内容不同，因此我们不指望申请者说的特别具体，但要找出普遍的话题并谈一谈。”
The key is balance. Contrary to what Oxbridge demand, most universities will look for candidates to split their statements between their academic achievements and their extra-curricular pursuits – if these are relevant to your chosen degree, all the better.
关键在于平衡。和牛津剑桥的要求不同，大多数大学要求申请者将学业成就和课余爱好分开陈述，如果课余爱好与所选课程有关的话当然更好。
However, as Williams says, don’t go overboard. “The mistake people make is to mention too many clubs,” he says, “it makes us question how dedicated you’ll be to your study or work. Pick some key extra-curricular activities and think about the skills they give you and feed that into what you are doing.
不过，威廉姆斯说，也不要太过火。他说：“申请者常常会犯的错误就是提到太多社团。我们会怀疑你还能不能专心学习或工作。挑选一些重要的课余活动，想想你锻炼了哪些技能，并和你所做的结合起来。”
“Avoid the vacuous statement,” he adds, “the statement that seems to say a lot, but actually says nothing at all, for example ‘I am a people person; committed to doing my best at every opportunity’.”
他补充说：“要避免空洞的个人陈述。有些个人陈述看似说了很多，其实啥也没说，比如‘我善于与人打交道，每次做事都会全力以赴。’”
Stock phrases should be avoided at all costs, and applicants should also be careful not to exaggerate their achievements. Be warned; if you are invited to interview, you should expect to be quizzed on what you have said in your statement. White lies won’t impress anyone and can become pretty obvious pretty quickly under pressure.
要尽可能避免写套话，也得小心不要夸大其词。需要注意的是，如果你受邀参加面试，你将会被问到你在个人陈述中写的内容。善意的谎言无法打动他人，而且在压力之下很快就会被戳穿。
Applicants should also avoid copying anyone else’s statement or taking inspiration from the internet, says Balnaves. Ucas uses a program called Copycatch to identify similarities in statements and notifies the universities if it picks up anything suspicious.
巴尔内夫斯说，申请者也不要抄别人的个人陈述，或者从网上找灵感。英国大学和学院招生服务中心使用名为“抓取复制”的程序来检查个人陈述的相似之处，发现可疑之处会提醒学校。
Balnaves also urges students to review their statements for spelling and grammar and to apply in good time. “We probably get about 10 percent of our applications in the last week,” he says, “but it’s best to give yourself some breathing space. The best advice you can get is from a family member or a teacher, read it aloud to them so you haven't missed any crucial bits.
巴尔内夫斯还敦促申请者检查个人陈述的拼写和语法错误并及时提交。他说：“有大约10%的申请是在最后一周提交的，但最好留些富余时间。你能从家人或老师那里得到最好的建议，写好后大声读给他们听，这样就不会漏掉一些关键点。”
“Write about what makes you unique," he continues, "only you know your unique selling points. Ask yourself ‘what makes me different, what will I bring to the university and what will I get out of it?’”
他接着说：“写一写你在哪些方面与众不同。只有你自己知道自己的‘独特卖点’。问问你自己‘是什么品质让我不一样？我能为学校带来什么？又将从学校得到什么？’”
个人陈述写作的“要”与“不要”
DO check for spelling and grammar - get your parents to double check and then check again
要检查拼写和语法错误---让父母再给你检查两三遍
DO link your extra-curricular pursuits with your course choice
要把你的课余爱好和课程选择联系起来
DO show your teachers a draft first – so you will know what to change in plenty of time
要先给老师看看初稿，这样你就有足够的时间修改
DON’T use suggested synonyms unless you’re sure what they mean
不要使用有暗示性的同义词，除非你确切知道是什么意思
DON’T be tempted to exaggerate what you’ve done
不要夸张描述个人经历
DON’T talk about specific universities, only talk about the subject
不要谈论特定的几所大学，只谈论课程本身
First, you will have to register with Ucas and enter your personal details. You will then be able to apply for up to five courses. Make sure you cross reference the course requirements with your predicted grades and A-level choices so you won’t get rejected before you have even taken your exams.
首先，你需要在英国大学和学院招生服务中心网站注册，并录入个人信息。之后你可以申请最多五种课程。要确保将课程要求和你预计的成绩以及A-level（英国高中课程）选择加以对照，以免还没考试就被学校拒了。
You will then be asked to detail your education and qualifications to date and to give details of any jobs you have had. It’s also a good idea to nail down who will be providing your academic reference as soon as possible – make sure you give your teacher enough time to make it a good one.
之后，你将被要求详述迄今为止的教育背景和所获证书，以及你做过什么工作。最好能尽快找到人选为你写学术推荐信，要确保你为写推荐信的老师留出了足够的时间，这样才能写好。
Finally, before you submit your application, you will be asked to include your personal statement. This is your chance to convince your university or college that you are the right person to study their course.
最后，在提交申请前，你还要按要求提交个人陈述。这是你说服申请院校录取你的一个机会。
For some people, writing a personal statement will come easily. But for those who are feeling daunted about the prospect of putting 4,000 characters together, you are not alone. A
自然拼读法4-15岁孩子记单词方法
s Stuart Balnaves, head of learner experience at Ucas, puts it: “Those three words – Ucas personal statement – can stike fear into students’ hearts", but there are ways to make the process easier.
对大多数人来说，写个人陈述并不困难。但也有不少人一想到要写4000字的文章就头皮发麻。英国大学和学院招生服务中心学生体验负责人斯图亚特-巴尔内夫斯说：“入学个人陈述这三个词语会让学生心生恐慌”，但有些办法能让这件事儿更简单。
To start with, jot down reasons why you want to study your chosen course. Is it a new passion or an old interest? Were you inspired by something you read or does it lead towards the career you would eventually like to pursue – in which case, what is it that appeals to you about that career?
首先，大概写下为什么你选择了这一课程。是最近才感兴趣，还是由来已久？是受到了某篇文章的启发，还是决心今后干这一行？这个职业又有哪些吸引你的地方？
Secondly, think about what you can say you have done to demonstrate why you are passionate about this particular subject. Have you taken part in a society or club outside of school? Do you enjoy reading about your subject, if yes, what books particularly interest you and why?
其次，想想看如何描述个人经历，以便说明为什么对这一课程充满热情。你在课外参加过社会实践或者加入过社团吗？喜欢读有关的书吗？如果是，你对哪些书最感兴趣？为什么？
Have you worked in any roles that help with skills that universities might find appealing? Have you helped fellow students at school, have you volunteered or undertaken work experience in your field?
你做过哪些工作，有助于提升大学所需技能吗？你在学校帮助过同学吗？参加过志愿活动，或者在你自己感兴趣的领域有过工作经验吗？
“The best statements will show that a student is interested in the subject; that they've studied it, that they've developed an interest it in outside school, and that they're developing their skills and abilities outside academia,” says Liz Hunt, undergraduate admissions manager at the University of Sheffield.
英国谢菲尔德大学本科入学主管利兹-亨特说：“最好的个人陈述能表明申请者对课程感兴趣，曾有过这方面的学习经历，在课外也有相关爱好，除学业外，也一直在提升个人能力。”
However, she advises students to avoid rambling: “Some try to tell you their life story,” she continues, “sometimes this can be quite useful, but it needs to be relevant rambling, it needs to tell admissions tutors why you have decided on a particular subject.”
但她建议学生不要啰嗦：“一些学生试图讲述生活中的故事，有时这很有用，但这得和申请有关，得是在告诉招生老师为什么你决定学习这一课程。”
James Williams, lecturer in education at the University of Sussex, agrees: “Admissions tutors are looking to see that you have an understanding about the course you are applying for,” he says. “Content of courses will be different at different universities, so we don’t look for applicants to be too specific, but candidates should look for common topics and address these.”
英国苏塞克斯大学教育学讲师詹姆斯-威廉姆斯也同意这一点，他说：“招生老师会注意看你是否理解你申请的课程。不同大学的课程内容不同，因此我们不指望申请者说的特别具体，但要找出普遍的话题并谈一谈。”
The key is balance. Contrary to what Oxbridge demand, most universities will look for candidates to split their statements between their academic achievements and their extra-curricular pursuits – if these are relevant to your chosen degree, all the better.
关键在于平衡。和牛津剑桥的要求不同，大多数大学要求申请者将学业成就和课余爱好分开陈述，如果课余爱好与所选课程有关的话当然更好。
However, as Williams says, don’t go overboard. “The mistake people make is to mention too many clubs,” he says, “it makes us question how dedicated you’ll be to your study or work. Pick some key extra-curricular activities and think about the skills they give you and feed that into what you are doing.
不过，威廉姆斯说，也不要太过火。他说：“申请者常常会犯的错误就是提到太多社团。我们会怀疑你还能不能专心学习或工作。挑选一些重要的课余活动，想想你锻炼了哪些技能，并和你所做的结合起来。”
“Avoid the vacuous statement,” he adds, “the statement that seems to say a lot, but actually says nothing at all, for example ‘I am a people person; committed to doing my best at every opportunity’.”
他补充说：“要避免空洞的个人陈述。有些个人陈述看似说了很多，其实啥也没说，比如‘我善于与人打交道，每次做事都会全力以赴。’”
Stock phrases should be avoided at all costs, and applicants should also be careful not to exaggerate their achievements. Be warned; if you are invited to interview, you should expect to be quizzed on what you have said in your statement. White lies won’t impress anyone and can become pretty obvious pretty quickly under pressure.
要尽可能避免写套话，也得小心不要夸大其词。需要注意的是，如果你受邀参加面试，你将会被问到你在个人陈述中写的内容。善意的谎言无法打动他人，而且在压力之下很快就会被戳穿。
Applicants should also avoid copying anyone else’s statement or taking inspiration from the internet, says Balnaves. Ucas uses a program called Copycatch to identify similarities in statements and notifies the universities if it picks up anything suspicious.
巴尔内夫斯说，申请者也不要抄别人的个人陈述，或者从网上找灵感。英国大学和学院招生服务中心使用名为“抓取复制”的程序来检查个人陈述的相似之处，发现可疑之处会提醒学校。
Balnaves also urges students to review their statements for spelling and grammar and to apply in good time. “We probably get about 10 percent of our applications in the last week,” he says, “but it’s best to give yourself some breathing space. The best advice you can get is from a family member or a teacher, read it aloud to them so you haven't missed any crucial bits.
巴尔内夫斯还敦促申请者检查个人陈述的拼写和语法错误并及时提交。他说：“有大约10%的申请是在最后一周提交的，但最好留些富余时间。你能从家人或老师那里得到最好的建议，写好后大声读给他们听，这样就不会漏掉一些关键点。”
“Write about what makes you unique," he continues, "only you know your unique selling points. Ask yourself ‘what makes me different, what will I bring to the university and what will I get out of it?’”
他接着说：“写一写你在哪些方面与众不同。只有你自己知道自己的‘独特卖点’。问问你自己‘是什么品质让我不一样？我能为学校带来什么？又将从学校得到什么？’”
个人陈述写作的“要”与“不要”
DO check for spelling and grammar - get your parents to double check and then check again
要检查拼写和语法错误---让父母再给你检查两三遍
DO link your extra-curricular pursuits with your course choice
要把你的课余爱好和课程选择联系起来
DO show your teachers a draft first – so you will know what to change in plenty of time
要先给老师看看初稿，这样你就有足够的时间修改
DON’T use suggested synonyms unless you’re sure what they mean
不要使用有暗示性的同义词，除非你确切知道是什么意思
DON’T be tempted to exaggerate what you’ve done
不要夸张描述个人经历
DON’T talk about specific universities, only talk about the subject
不要谈论特定的几所大学，只谈论课程本身
